NeverSayGoodBye

1 Nov 11, 22:51

Noah

Last month, Japanese engineer Shoji Tanaka unveiled his latest invention. The Noah shelter is a large, fibreglass, tennis ball-shaped flotation capsule that up to four people can climb into in the event of a tsunami. Tanaka says he's already taken over 600 orders for his invention, which sells for around £2,400.

Longreach Buoyancy Deployment System

If you're caught in a Bondi rip tide, you'd better hope the lifeguard surfing to your rescue is carrying one of these bad boys. The Longreach Buoyancy Deployment System, designed by Sydney resident Samuel Adeloju, is a portable bazooka that allows those carrying it to 'fire' buoyancy devices at struggling swimmers up to 150 metres away. The main unit comes equipped with flares to help users identify the target and, upon hitting the water, the buoyancy aid inflates. The system is about to be trialled by lifeguards in New South Wales.

The Hövding

The Hövding, which goes on sale this winter, is a bike helmet for those who don't 'do' bike helmets. It's been created by Swedish designers Anna Haupt and Terese Alstin, with a shawl-like collar that works like an airbag. Upon impact, it inflates to form a pillow-like helmet that surrounds the head. The sensors responsible for inflating the device work by detecting abnormal movements of the bicycle rider - in other words, if your bike's sideswiped by a car, the airbag will inflate before your bonce hits the concrete.

Tactical Sammich

Apocalypses can be tough. Even if you manage to avoid the flesh-eating zombies there's still the threat of starvation, something American small arms manufacturer CMMG has clearly thought of. The Tactical Sammich is a sandwich that will stay fresh and (hopefully) tasty for more than two years. The Sammich comes in pepperoni or barbecue beef flavour and contains over 300 calories

Burglar Blaster

The wall-mounted Burglar Blaster device is fitted with an infrared motion sensor which can detect intruders and make their life rather unpleasant. Should an unwanted guest arrive, the gadget responds with a stream of noxious tear gas - sure to have the bleary-eyed burglar/axe murderer rethinking their career path.

ABS Avalanche Airbag System

Beacons and transmitters can help relay your location if you're unlucky enough to be buried by an avalanche, but an ABS Airbag might just be enough to prevent the avalanche swallowing you up in the first place. ABS Avalanche Airbags are backpacks fitted with two airbags that inflate when an activation handle is pulled, allowing the wearer to float to the top of the sliding snow pack, rather than suffocate beneath it. Data collected by the Swiss Federal Institute for Snow Science and Avalanche Research suggests that 97% of ABS-wearing avalanche victims survive, while 90% emerge completely unscathed.

Avalung

If that avalanche does catch up with you, outdoor equipment specialists Black Diamond might have what you need. Those buried in an avalanche often suffocate due to the fact that the surrounding ice quickly becomes saturated with carbon monoxide. The Avalung works by extracting fresh air from snow packed around your body, before dissipating the expelled carbon monoxide through a valve positioned on your back. In theory, the Avalung, could provide up to 58 minutes of fresh air; those trapped in an avalanche normally run out of oxygen and suffocate in around 15 minutes.

Bulletproof clipboard

This bulletproof clipboard is capable of stopping a 9mm bullet. In fact, the clipboard is actually hewn from a slab of genuine level 2 body armour, and comes with a 25-year warranty. The ultimate accessory for those cursed with bosses prone to violent outbursts

The Life Saver Bottle

Next time you're hiking through the Amazon rainforest and fancy a drink, make sure you have one of these. The Life Saver Bottle, which has been approved by the London School of Hygiene and Tropical Medicine, uses a carbon filter along with a filtration membrane to remove water-borne nasties, providing a clean, safe supply of drinking water no matter where you may be.

Scosche portable radiation detector

Sure, your new smartphone has some pretty flash features - but can it save you from blundering into areas of high radiation? Like some kind of real-life Pip-Boy, Scosche's portable radiation detector plugs into your iPhone, enabling you to check whether radiation levels are safe, elevated or dangerous. See red and it's time to evacuate. The blurb on the website explains how potential buyers can "share results with friends around the globe" although we rather hope that if that red light flashes the emergency services will be your first port of call.

Blast-proof boxers

We suspect these may be the safest undies in the world. The Blast Boxers are made from Aramid - the same tough material used to make bulletproof vests - and feature Kevlar panels around the groin and femoral arteries. The boxers' creators - military accessories manufacturer BCB - believe this could offer life-saving protection from explosive devices. BCB hope the Blast Boxers will soon be the underwear of choice for those on the frontline, but in the meantime, those in need of some serious protection for their nether regions can pick up a pair for just £54.

^Acid^ aka s|aO^eH~

2 Nov 11, 08:46

Bio-Hawk

2 Nov 11, 16:03

Bulletproof clipboard

This bulletproof clipboard is capable of stopping a 9mm bullet. In fact, the clipboard is actually hewn from a slab of genuine level 2 body armour, and comes with a 25-year warranty. The ultimate accessory for those cursed with bosses prone to violent outbursts

All you have to do is to make sure Boss fires on the board.