140 Million Iraqis and 1 Blonde
President Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar. Dick Cheney walks over and says, "What are you guys doing in here?"
Bush says, "We're planning WW III ".
And Cheney says, "Really? How do you plan to pull that off?"
Bush says, "Well, we're going to kill 140 million Iraqis this time and one blonde with big tits."
Cheney exclaimed, "A blonde with big tits? Why kill a blonde with big tits?"
Bush turns to Powell and says, "See, I told you he wouldn't worry about the 140 million Iraqis!"
In The Casket
3 buddies die in a car crash, they go to heaven to an orientation. They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family aremourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you?
The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man."
The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children oftomorrow."
The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say......LOOK, HE'S MOVING!!!!!"
4 Nuns & a Tv
4 Nuns at a church wanted to watch TV. The first one said she wanted to watch the INDY 500. The second one wanted to watch the sexy Shawn Michelson WWF. The third nun said she wanted to watch the knitting channel so shecan knit some mittens for the kitchen. The fourth nun said she wanted to watch the discovery channel on how a baby is born. After some dicussion, they all decided to flip channels every 2 seconds so they can watch the same things. This is what is sounded like: And they're off! They're on top of each other! In...Out...In...Out...and yes, the baby is born!
Ouch!
A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he'd lost his cigarettes.
In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. "No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes," he said to himself. He proceeded to get out his hammer and flattened the hump.
As he was cleaning up, the lady came in. "Here," she said, handing him his pack of cigarettes. "I found them in the hallway." "Now," she said, "if only I could find my gerbil."
Originally posted by Ha ha ho ho hee hee a-ha:140 Million Iraqis and 1 Blonde
President Bush and Colin Powell are sitting in a bar. Dick Cheney walks over and says, "What are you guys doing in here?"
Bush says, "We're planning WW III ".
And Cheney says, "Really? How do you plan to pull that off?"
Bush says, "Well, we're going to kill 140 million Iraqis this time and one blonde with big tits."
Cheney exclaimed, "A blonde with big tits? Why kill a blonde with big tits?"
Bush turns to Powell and says, "See, I told you he wouldn't worry about the 140 million Iraqis!"In The Casket
3 buddies die in a car crash, they go to heaven to an orientation. They are all asked, "When you are in your casket and friends and family aremourning upon you, what would you like to hear them say about you?
The first guy says, "I would like to hear them say that I was a great doctor of my time, and a great family man."
The second guy says, "I would like to hear that I was a wonderful husband and school teacher which made a huge difference in our children oftomorrow."
The last guy replies, "I would like to hear them say......LOOK, HE'S MOVING!!!!!"4 Nuns & a Tv
4 Nuns at a church wanted to watch TV. The first one said she wanted to watch the INDY 500. The second one wanted to watch the sexy Shawn Michelson WWF. The third nun said she wanted to watch the knitting channel so shecan knit some mittens for the kitchen. The fourth nun said she wanted to watch the discovery channel on how a baby is born. After some dicussion, they all decided to flip channels every 2 seconds so they can watch the same things. This is what is sounded like: And they're off! They're on top of each other! In...Out...In...Out...and yes, the baby is born!
Ouch!
A carpet layer had just finished installing carpet for a lady. He stepped out for a smoke, only to realize he'd lost his cigarettes.
In the middle of the room, under the carpet, was a bump. "No sense pulling up the entire floor for one pack of smokes," he said to himself. He proceeded to get out his hammer and flattened the hump.
As he was cleaning up, the lady came in. "Here," she said, handing him his pack of cigarettes. "I found them in the hallway." "Now," she said, "if only I could find my gerbil."
Last one is sick...