1. Three guys find a lamp. They rub it and a genie pops out.
The genie says:"I'll grant you each one wish."
The first guy says:"I wish I was 10 times smarter."
The genie says:"Poof! You're 10 times smarter."
The second guy says:"I wish to be 100 times smarter."
And the genie says:"Poof! You're 100 times smarter."
The last guy says:"I wish to be 1,000 times smarter."
And the genie says:"Poof! You're a women!!"
2. What's the difference between a man and E.T.?
E.T. phoned home.
3. Why does it take 1 million sperm to fertilise one egg?
They won't stop to ask directions.
4. Why are men like blenders?
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
5. What's the difference between government bonds and men?
Bonds mature.