Ten Verses Your Pastor Will Never Preach About... LOL...
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10. 2 Kings 2:23-24 NKJV
Then he went up from there to Bethel; and as he was going up the road, some youths came from the city and mocked him, and said to him, “Go up, you baldhead! Go up, you baldhead!” So he turned around and looked at them, and pronounced a curse on them in the name of the LORD. And two female bears came out of the woods and mauled forty-two of the youths.
09. Mark 14:51-52 NASB
A young man was following Him, wearing nothing but a linen sheet over his naked body; and they seized him. But he pulled free of the linen sheet and escaped naked.
08. Deuteronomy 23:1 ESV
No one whose testicles are crushed or whose male organ is cut off shall enter the assembly of the Lord.
07. Genesis 38:8-10 NASB
Then Judah said to Onan, “Go in to your brother’s wife, and perform your duty as a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother.” Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother’s wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also.
06. 1 Samuel 18:25-27 ESV
Then Saul said, “Thus shall you say to David, ‘The king desires no bride-price except a hundred foreskins of the Philistines, that he may be avenged of the king’s enemies.’” Now Saul thought to make David fall by the hand of the Philistines. And when his servants told David these words, it pleased David well to be the king’s son-in-law. Before the time had expired, David arose and went, along with his men, and killed two hundred of the Philistines. And David brought their foreskins, which were given in full number to the king, that he might become the king’s son-in-law. And Saul gave him his daughter Michal for a wife.
05. Exodus 4:24-25 NASB
Now it came about at the lodging place on the way that the LORD met him and sought to put him to death. Then Zipporah took a flint and cut off her son’s foreskin and threw it at Moses’ feet, and she said, “You are indeed a bridegroom of blood to me.”
04. Ezekiel 16:17 NIV
You also took the fine jewelry I gave you, the jewelry made of my gold and silver, and you made for yourself male idols and engaged in prostitution with them.
03. Ezekiel 23:19-20 NET
Yet she increased her prostitution, remembering the days of her youth when she engaged in prostitution in the land of Egypt. She lusted after their genitals – as large as those of donkeys, and their seminal emission was as strong as that of stallions.
02. Judges 3:19-25 ESV
And Ehud reached with his left hand, took the sword from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly. And the hilt also went in after the blade, and the fat closed over the blade, for he did not pull the sword out of his belly; and the dung came out.
01. Deuteronomy 25:11-12 NASB
If two men, a man and his countryman, are struggling together, and the wife of one comes near to deliver her husband from the hand of the one who is striking him, and puts out her hand and seizes his genitals, then you shall cut off her hand; you shall not show pity.
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cool.
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BTW, I'm a Christian, just felt those verses are pretty hilarious. No insults intended, whatsoever.
Feel free to add-on to the list... -
Originally posted by VODKA KE0601:
I remember quite clearly Pastor Prince preached this during one of the midweek bible studies.
02. Judges 3:19-25 ESV
And Ehud reached with his left hand, took the sword from his right thigh, and thrust it into his belly. And the hilt also went in after the blade, and the fat closed over the blade, for he did not pull the sword out of his belly; and the dung came out.[/b] -
Originally posted by VODKA KE0601:
This one looks familiar too.
[b]07. Genesis 38:8-10 NASB
Then Judah said to Onan, “Go in to your brother’s wife, and perform your duty as a brother-in-law to her, and raise up offspring for your brother.” Onan knew that the offspring would not be his; so when he went in to his brother’s wife, he wasted his seed on the ground in order not to give offspring to his brother. But what he did was displeasing in the sight of the LORD; so He took his life also.
[/b] -
Originally posted by VODKA KE0601:
I wanted to start a topic about this strange verse in Mark not so long ago .. but did not 'cos any proper discussion will have to bring in non canonical biblical documents.
09. Mark 14:51-52 NASB
A young man was following Him, wearing nothing but a linen sheet over his naked body; and they seized him. But he pulled free of the linen sheet and escaped naked.[/b]
Most Christians are ignorant about biblical documents outside their New Testament. -
Maybe Catholics will preach it during one of their anti-masturbation sermons.Originally posted by laoda99:This one looks familiar too. -
I had always thought that the one who was seized here is Jesus, cause in the context of the passage as a hold, its about the Arrest of Jesus.Originally posted by VODKA KE0601:09. Mark 14:51-52 NASB
A young man was following Him, wearing nothing but a linen sheet over his naked body; and they seized him. But he pulled free of the linen sheet and escaped naked.[/b][/quote]
[quote]Originally posted by Icemoon:
I wanted to start a topic about this strange verse in Mark not so long ago .. but did not 'cos any proper discussion will have to bring in non canonical biblical documents.
Most Christians are ignorant about biblical documents outside their New Testament.
anyway, here is the NIV version of it
48"Am I leading a rebellion," said Jesus, "that you have come out with swords and clubs to capture me? 49Every day I was with you, teaching in the temple courts, and you did not arrest me. But the Scriptures must be fulfilled." 50Then everyone deserted him and fled.
51A young man, wearing nothing but a linen garment, was following Jesus. When they seized him, 52he fled naked, leaving his garment behind.
53They took Jesus to the high priest, and all the chief priests, elders and teachers of the law came together.
~Mark 14:48-53 -
It is ambiguous. The only thing we are sure is there is this young man wearing "very little" and he fled naked. Why did he become a flasher?Originally posted by vince69:I had always thought that the one who was seized here is Jesus, cause in the context of the passage as a hold, its about the Arrest of Jesus.
anyway, here is the NIV version of it
48"Am I leading a rebellion," said Jesus, "that you have come out with swords and clubs to capture me? 49Every day I was with you, teaching in the temple courts, and you did not arrest me. But the Scriptures must be fulfilled." 50Then everyone deserted him and fled.
51A young man, wearing nothing but a linen garment, was following Jesus. When they seized him, 52he fled naked, leaving his garment behind.
53They took Jesus to the high priest, and all the chief priests, elders and teachers of the law came together.
~Mark 14:48-53
I lean towards your interpretation because it is less likely the young man was seized and still can run away. -
How about the Songs of King Solomon?(aka The Book of Songs)
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I think I've read an interpretation saying that the young man in verse 51 actually refered to Mark himself. So verse 51 is Mark's way of saying that he was an eye witness to the eventsOriginally posted by vince69:I had always thought that the one who was seized here is Jesus, cause in the context of the passage as a hold, its about the Arrest of Jesus.
anyway, here is the NIV version of it
48"Am I leading a rebellion," said Jesus, "that you have come out with swords and clubs to capture me? 49Every day I was with you, teaching in the temple courts, and you did not arrest me. But the Scriptures must be fulfilled." 50Then everyone deserted him and fled.
51A young man, wearing nothing but a linen garment, was following Jesus. When they seized him, 52he fled naked, leaving his garment behind.
53They took Jesus to the high priest, and all the chief priests, elders and teachers of the law came together.
~Mark 14:48-53 -
Where is the basis? Explain why did Mark go naked?Originally posted by fallin:I think I've read an interpretation saying that the young man in verse 51 actually refered to Mark himself. So verse 51 is Mark's way of saying that he was an eye witness to the events -
Huh?????Originally posted by fallin:I think I've read an interpretation saying that the young man in verse 51 actually refered to Mark himself. So verse 51 is Mark's way of saying that he was an eye witness to the events
this is the first time I heard of this type of interpretation ....
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yah lor .. must resort to being naked to grab people's attention?Originally posted by vince69:Huh?????
this is the first time I heard of this type of interpretation ....
how about you? who do you think is the mysterious guy? -
to be honest, I have no idea and I don't really want to speculate about this (though I must admit, its kind of funny, but then, since everyone else is running away in fear, they may not have notice him loh)Originally posted by Icemoon:yah lor .. must resort to being naked to grab people's attention?
how about you? who do you think is the mysterious guy?
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Songs of King Solomon go to gnostic christiansOriginally posted by Herzog_Zwei:How about the Songs of King Solomon?(aka The Book of Songs) aka Songs of Zion..