A Brief Summary of Points1. Character
- How a person treats himself; which reflects on how he/she treats others, then on how he/she treats his/her partner and then later his children.
Personality traits are different from character. Examples are being caring, patient, kind..etc... cream of the cake. Character's the substance, which consists of 4 main qualities/points.
i) Commitment to personal growth
- Commitment to God's Word & lifestyle
- Placing God first in his/her life
- Seeking and trusing God & His Word
- Leading an exciting, adventurous & purposeful lifestyle in God
ii) Able to receive Help & Guidance
- Teachability
- Openess to help & counselling when crisis arises
Therefore, find out ifpartner is as open in this area as u so that it'll not be too late when crisis in the relationship occurs.
iii) Consciousness of his/her weakness/problem areas
- So that your partner will also become aware of them as time passes.
- Pride & stubborness in a relationship will turn the whole relationship into a bloody battlefield.
iv) Setting Personal growth for Real Change
- He/she must be determined to change for the better if there're certain areas necessary for it. And it must be a REAL change.
2a. Emotional Openess
- A partner should be able to feel unless he/she's a tin can. And also, say how he/she feels. Being able to express and communicate their feelings.
- Ability to say how much u love that person.
- Ability to share feelings.
2b. Emotional Generosity (This trait provides key access to a person's soul)
- Of course, not missing out on generous & unconditional love in the relationship.
- Ability to show his/her love.
- Not Stingy.
3. Integrity (Walking in truth / represents consistancy of character)
- Say what u mean, mean what u say
- Do what u mean, mean what u do
- Honesty & trustworthiness & reliability
- Without this trait, one can never gain respect; let alone a partner
- Also honesty in the way one feels
4. Maturity & Responsibility
- Outward life is the reflection of the inward life
(Responsibility determines Maturity)
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Taking action for any present situations by understanding certain boundaries. It's not a concept, it's an action.
5. Healthy Self-esteem
- Love yourself.
(Note: U choose to love a person, not because u have to, but because u want to)
- Don't self-abuse. If u r suffering & wanna get out of it, get out of it!
- Never let others abuse u. Be
meek, but not weak.
(Being meek is not retaliating quickly when persecuted, rather having grace towards the persecutor. It doesn't means keeping this way for long either, one must fight 4 one's right, when the time comes.) (A wimp doesn't like to take risk or "cause trouble", and always procrastinates, because a wimp feels low about him/herself.)
6. Positive Attitude Towards Life
- Yup. Being optimistic could help. Who likes a hard-core pessimist as a mate?
7. Personal Chemistry (This isn't a trait)
[Songs of Solomon 4:9]
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refer
- Are you attracted to the other party?
- Is there a bond?
This is NOT a trait. Either you have it, or don't even have it.
It's very hard to have a successful lasting relationship without personal chemistry (physical attraction).
HOWEVER, personal chemistry need not have to be instantaneous.
It could also take time to build. So... that's a good news. Remain as friends; go out in a group and then decide and from there, choose your potential mate!
Good Luck!
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